Sheboygan Falls, WI – The Sheboygan Falls High School is relieved that it is currently the summer break. The source of their bell tone system has failed to work properly for the past couple of days and are at a loss if they will be able to find a replacement or afford an upgrade.
“Whouldn’t ya know that the darn’d thing up’d and gave out on the last day of school. Pretty lucky if you asked me!” said Darlene Lundergarten the school principal.
Sheboygan Falls had relied on an Atari 5200 ever since it was hard wired into the school’s tone system in 1982. The 1982-1983 school board wanted to modernize the old Sheboygan school by installing current technologies, but as cheaply as possible. Jimmy Tucker’s parents donated an Atarti 5200 that year because he had been a very bad boy during a visit with his grandparents and didn’t deserve the Christmas gift that would have been. A local electrical engineering hippy rigged the 5200 to automate a tone to indicate the beginning and end of a school period. The Sheboygan Falls district has been trying to find someone to recode the system ever since the hippie man disappeared or died.
The school system has since petitioned the citizens of the Sheboygan Falls district for donations to replace the Atari 5200 with a modern Xbox One or possibly a Wii U. Their latest fundraising report shows they only have enough for a used Nintendo 3DS.
“That ‘lil weird contraption would certainly be the upgrade to the old Atari computer core, but we think this next generation Xbox thingie is a better bang for our buck.”