Senator Blames Anger on Angry Birds

Senator Blames Anger on Angry Birds
  • 1
  • 3
  •  
  •  
  •  

Senator Mike Johanns has been in hot water lately all because of playing a popular mobile game called Angry Birds. He was attending a fund raiser dinner and he took the opportunity to play Angry Birds during a some down time. Mr. Johanns would describe the incident as “interacting with a video game application called Angry Birds.” After completing several frustrating levels like a “rockstar” by getting all three stars, Johanns would hear a young girl sneeze. Rather than saying “bless you,” he proclaimed “gosh darn yah!” This caused the young girl to be confused and embarrassed. She had excused herself with her parents from the room. Johnanns at the time not realizing what had been said continued to play his current challenge until it had been cleared. He was soon advised of what had occurred and he quietly excused himself for the evening.

Mike+Johanns+bored+angry+birdsThe senator has since explained that he did not mean what he said. He much would rather bless that young girl. His outburst was triggered by the violence and destruction as promoted in Angry Birds. The Senator was quick to point out a new study released coincidentally to confirm the senator’s innocence. Those at the press conference questioned Senator Johnanns as to the author or authority of the report. He said all the information could be found online. He then proceeded to explain to those in attendance how to use Google. Ironically, many in the group would be seen playing Angry Birds during the Senators lecture to find his sources.

Senator Johanns promised to introduce legislation that will ban violence in mobile video games. He made remarks to where before the rise of smart phones you were contained to the living room or parent’s basement when engaging with violent games. Now you can heighten your unconscious violent regions of the brain and you may not even realize it. This was emphasized during the interview with the senator. As he continued, he said how there has yet to be a documented death or injury tied to the mobile video games, however, that would be reactionary. “The people of America deserve a congress who have vision to prevent future threats” -Johanns

Those leaving the meeting have also reported that they saw Mr. Johanns talking with former Senator Joe Leiberman. After an award exchange of superficial pleasantries, Leibereman handed Johnanns some dusty looking documents from the 1990’s. Senator Johanns and Leiberman quickly parted ways and couldn’t be found in the area. Many expect this talk of the introduction of a new law to be just political grandstanding until this scandal becomes old news.