Sonic the Hedgehog in Coffee Sparks New Religion

Sonic the Hedgehog in Coffee Sparks New Religion
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sonic-isms“It was a Sign of a new truth”

Said Hank Garbers local resident of Girard, Georgia. Hank went to his local Starbucks to be faced with an awe inspiring image. He was on auto-pilot that morning as he barely got any sleep the morning before. He almost took a sip before he discovered Sonic smiling at him. He stopped for a second, then immediately instagram’ed a picture. Still, in disbelief, couldn’t believe his Valencia edited creation.

“My whole world and life had changed from that moment forward”

Hank turned to ask the barista about the strange face, but decided not to as the image was too inspirational. That was the beginning. His image was insta-shared to twitter where his small followers retweeted the novel picture. They were the first to see what would be a creation of a new fellowship. As his newsfeed tells us, he drank the entire Venti in one sitting, but he lost track of time, and he all of a sudden had the urge to use the restroom. Somehow he felt compelled to run there with this new burst of energy. As he described the feeling a ultra surge of bouncy energy, his heart was racing, and he “really really” had to go! Here are some excerpts from his life-tweeted experience. “Nw rushh of enerrgy”, “I feel as if i can solve the world’s problems”, and “I found a gold ring on the floor #awesome”

Many have equivocated the sighting to other religious food imagery such as the Virgin Mary in a Grilled Cheese. It wasn’t long before his phone was pinging with retweets and new followers who made the same connection. He now has a whopping 4.4 million followers on twitter and growing, and 1.2 followers on Instagram. All because of a foamy Sonic the Hedgehog.

We asked how she felt about the entire set of events. She said, “I made that because I saw his Halo background on his iphone.” Clearly, fully of jealousy that she did not get to partake in the Sonic Wisdom that now Hank has been bestow. We went to question the other patrons, they are full of inspiration. They have explained how Hank quit his job to write to his followers and Instagram clouds with his new sonic-isms. They are followers of his as they showed us on their phones. They also explained that they are going to his first gathering. They continued by saying, “It’s next week when the Starbucks opens next Saturday morning. We have been called to stare at clouds and play Sonic on our portable devices. We then too will experience the Sonic rush. “